Sunday, August 23, 2009

Earth Under Attack (Chapter 1)

A Prisoner Escapes

7 years later

It was a rainy day on the swamp planet of Mars. Mars was the second rainiest planet in the galaxy besides Neptune and Earth was the third. And sitting in a leaky cell that was half submerged in water sat a figure wearing rags it was not a Martian, no not even close it was in fact a Saturian it was thin and pale from lack of food for it had lived in a dark cell for more than 13 years.
The rain seemed to just add to his misery. Misery had been his only companion for longer than he wanted to admit and more than once it had been overcome by craziness, after all who could stay sane in such surroundings as he had lived in for years. The only time it ever remembered being happy was a couple years ago when he had gotten his first cell mate but that had only lasted a week before the war, the war in which all the prisoners had had to fight and the cell mate had been killed, but not before he could get the information from him, The information that would give him a status on Saturn. His name would be shouted upon the city streets of Saturn for miles around. What was his name you might ask? He could no longer remember, his name had no value to him or any other person on this devil of a planet, for as long as he could remember he had been known as prisoner 591, besides the information he held was much more valuable than a name.
Now all it had to do was get back to his planet and he would be rich and famous and that would most definitely make up for the years and years in which he would have rather been dead. But the chances of that ever happening were little to nothing. And so he entertained himself by rehearsing the information in his head and fantasizing what it would be like to get home and live in luxury for the rest of his life. But deep inside he knew he would die before that ever came to pass.
591 reached up and touched the metal collar around his neck it was practically a part of him now he had been in this prison for so long. He stood up and moved to the door grabbing onto the bars that made up the windows with both hands. The hallway outside his cell was empty the guards wouldn’t be by again until it was time for the meal. The moans of the sick plutonian down the hall was the only sounds that could be heard on this dismal day.
A scuffle behind him caused him to turn around and he smiled slightly to see his small shukan friend come scurrying out of a hole in the wall. 591 moved over to where his food was and grabbed the crust of bread that was left on his plate. It had become his habit in the last couple years to save a small piece of his bread in exchange for the shiny treasures that the little thief happened to steal. The little shukan hurried over to the little nest of hay that he had made in the corner of the cell and dropped the object in the nest with his other treasures. 591 moved over beside the nest and dropped to the ground beside it. The creature stuck its head out in curiosity a peace of hay clinging to its fur. 591 stuck the crust in front of the creatures nose and the creature took it in its paws stared at him for a moment and then stuck it in its mouth and hurried off to another corner to eat its prize.
While the creature was distracted by its meal 591 took the opportunity to dig out the object that the shukan had hidden in the hay. He finally found what looked like a small metal object with three holes and three prongs. He picked it up, stood and moved over to where his own bed was and dropped down into it examining the object as he did.
He loved trying to figure out what type of a person the objects belonged too. And what they were used for he imagined the holes used to have gems in it and that maybe it was a type of brooch for some great lady. Maybe much like himself he had been captured when the Martians had attacked his planet. Finally he tired of creating scenarios for the object and placed it down in the corner with his other treasures then he curled up and went to sleep.
He woke up a couple of hours later. He sat up to see that the bowl that he had left by the door had been refilled indicating that it was the next morning. He moved over and grabbed the bowl forcing it down his throat then grabbing the piece of bread and eating most of that setting aside a crust of bread for later. A scuffle at the hole announced the shukan’s arrival right on time. This time the creature held a small piece of reflective glass that 591 guessed was from a mirror. Moving over to the bed he stared into it getting a glimpse of himself for the first time in what seemed like millennium. His hair was short courtesies, of the annual shave that was given to all the prisoners on the anniversary of his capture, his skin was pale even for a Saturian and his eyes which were a light shade of purple had wrinkles and circles under them even though he got more that his fair share of sleep and rest. He then examined his neck and the collar around it. His neck was covered in scars from where the collar had rubbed the hardest in the first couple weeks. The collar itself was dirty but even so as strong as it had been the day it had been put on. The Martian language was scribbled around the side probably telling his number and other important things that the guards might want to know upon running into him. There were three small holes on one side probably meant for unlocking the thing all though he’d never heard of anybody who’d had the collar removed. The other side had two small circle marks that was anyone’s guess as too their purpose.
He lowered the mirror and turned to place it in the corner with the other objects when his eyes fell on the metal object from the night before. He picked up the mirror once more along with the object and moved back into his previous position.
Examining the collar once more with the mirror he took the device and pressed it into the holes. His heart jumped when three prongs popped out on the other side of his neck. With heart racing and hands beginning to shake he moved the key into his other hand and pressed the holes over the prongs. There was the sound of gears shifting and a small electric jolt raced through him as the collar opened and fell from his neck into his lap. Tears sprang to his eyes as he picked the object up and reached up to touch his callused neck. The tears came harder as he gripped the collar with all his strength then watched as it phased through his hand and fell back to his lap.
Finally he stood to his feet and walked toward the door pausing to look at the shukan who was still eating its meal. 591 bent down reaching his hand out to his little friend he motioned for the creature and it scurried up to him hesitating for only a moment in order to smell him before racing up his arm and onto his shoulder. “I owe you my life little guy!” 591 managed to whisper. “The least I can do is repay the favor.” Then he phased through the wall and out of the cell in a matter of moments he had made his way out of the prison without too much hassle. Then with no further delay he raced in the direction of the air craft hanger, powered up one of the machines and headed for home.

The Neeuk Bedula sat on her throne the weight of her world on her shoulders what she wouldn’t give to have her husband either one of them back to rule the planet so she didn’t have to. Or even for her three year old son Pula to grow up and take the throne. It wouldn’t be so bad if the late Gnik Tuck hadn’t left the planet in search of his fiancĂ©e leaving his kingdom to rot. Now the planet was nothing but ruins and her first husband the Gnik Oral had been Tuck’s advisor and became Gnik when Tuck disappeared. At that time she had been pregnant with her daughter, Farsi. When Oral was killed in an accident she married her husband’s best friend, Malon. Malon was the father of Pula but not long after Pula was born Malon had died from a disease called Quaple. But Malon had been a very foolish Gnik and had refused any advisors. So now Bedula ruled until her son was old enough to take her place or until by some miracle the true Gnik returned.
As she sat there trying to comprehend what to do about the latest dilemma that had surfaced, Ullie a man in his late 50’s and guard of the front gate entered “Your majesty a peasant at the door would like to speak with you, he says he knew Oral.”
“Let him enter.”

The prisoner sat in the courtyard examining all the beautiful glass sculptures he was sitting on a glass bench across from a sculpture of a Zulus a large magnificent creature with stubby little wings and thick white fur and scales on his head and feet. Just then the guard returned and led him to the throne room he bowed and told the Neeuk his news. “Your majesty,” he said his voice hoarse from neglect “I come with very important news that you my want to hear it come from a man in the depths of a prison clearly forgotten with no hope of being rescued and when in such a state you tend to tell your most trusted secrets.” Here he paused waiting for permission to go farther.
“Continue,” The Neeuk said “But make it quick…and it better be worth it I got bigger things to worry about than trivial matters.”
The prisoner nodded and continued obviously assured that his news was worth hearing. “My fellow prisoner had a secret that would have made him rich, he said he knew the where abouts of the one called Su Kutcha.”
“Who is this Su Kutcha you speak of?” The Neeuk interrupted.
“I am told she is one of the most wanted people in the universe. Mars wants her captured, Jupiter and Mercury want her captured. I think it would be good for us if we were the ones who captured her”
“What are you suggesting?”
“She was raised on earth, while she doesn’t live there anymore her family still does.”
Bedula nodded beginning to comprehend what 591 was starting to get at. “I see…we go for the family and we get the girl.”
“Exactly!”

591 sat in a bedroom a soft, rich blanket covered the bed. Oh how it would feel to live like this. He stretched himself out along the bed. The blankets felt familiar in fact this whole room seemed familiar. 591 sat up quickly and looked around sure enough the room looked like something straight out of his memories. He just couldn’t put his finger on why. 591 stood up and began pacing the room. He stopped in front of the fireplace. Above the fireplace hung a picture of a woman she had long beautiful hair that hung down around her shoulders. The prisoner reached up and touched his own stubby hair. The prison warden had made sure all the prisoners had short hair including the woman so that no one could tell the difference between male and female and everyone was just called he.
He glanced at the picture again. Underneath the picture was inscribed
“To my dearest Chi Chi.
I love you
From:
It was smudged so he couldn’t see who it was from. The prisoner sighed and walked over to the bed and lay down. Love stories how dull. His own love story had been disappointing he couldn’t even remember why all he knew was that it was sad so he didn’t try to think about it any longer. Soon he fell asleep the best sleep he had had in years
Days later the Neeuk herself had readied an army to go to earth. The Neeuk was standing on a hill overlooking a valley where her troops were getting ready beside her stood 591. She turned to the prisoner “If you are wrong about this you will spend the rest of your life in prison and you will not escape.”
“Trust me your majesty you won’t be sorry I got the information from a very reliable source a man in the pit of despair with out any hope of ever escaping. Like I said before, when in such a state one tends to tell his most trusted secrets. And even then the only way I could extract the information from him was to promise him his freedom when I escaped. But we were separated and I never saw him again but they killed him trying to get the information out of him.”
“For your sake I hope you are right.”

4 comments:

  1. I like your story! You might want to work on punctuation and such, but other than that you're doing great. Are you planning on trying to get the book published someday?

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  2. Yeah I know the pronounciation is a little off it's a work in progress but yes I do plan on one day publishing but not until I'm completly happy with the entire series at this point in time I've re-writen like 3 times and each time I change huge portions of the story. So how did you come to be reading my blog? Make sure you start with the very first post before you get to far otherwise you might be a little lost since this is the first chapter in the 6th book. I'm so excited that someone outside my family is following this blog. :)

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  3. When people comment on Susie's blog, I click on their names and look at the blogs they have and follow. I've found a couple neat ones that way. I saw that you were writing a story and looked at it, and I really like it so far. I've read all of what you've posted up to this point, and I'll keep reading as you post more. I'm trying to write a story myself. I might have a blog for it similar to this one, but I'm not sure I'll just wait and see. I know what you mean about re-writing stories and changing large portions. The story I'm writing now is the second version. I didn't get very far the first time, but I still decided to completely rethink the story and what I wanted it to be about. It's still similar to the first version, but it's thought out better and the storyline is better, in my opinion.

    Keep up the good work! I can't wait to read more. :D

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  4. The first chapter of my story, and three character bios can be found at http://journeyfiction.blogspot.com/ if you would like to read it.

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